I’m Thinking About Separating

Here are 5 things to know if you are thinking of parting ways:

1. Maintain respect – Separation is tough on both parties irrespective of the reasons behind it. It’s important to be respectful, calm and kind as much as you can during this time. The less anger and conflict the better.

2. Start thinking about the practical – Always remember that in most cases no decisions have to be made overnight, but it IS important to start thinking about the practical decisions that will need to be made down the track if you choose to separate. Where will you or your partner live? Are you going to separate for a period of time and live under one roof? How will you support yourself? If you are able to start thinking and working towards some of these matters, it can help provide a little more clarity. You might for example make an appointment with a financial advisor or centrelink to understand your options better.  

3. Get support – whether that be from professionals, your doctor, friends or family. Separation is a difficult time and if you are thinking of going down this path it is helpful to have a support team around you. 

4. Separation doesn’t have to mean it’s over – Just because you decide to take time out and separate for a period of time, doesn’t mean it is always over. Space can be good for some people and with time and work there may be a chance to reconcile. Every situation is different but sometimes time apart can help you both figure out exactly what you want going forward. 

5. Social media – Last but certainly not least, do not pour your heart out on social media! As tempting as it might be to seek support through these channels, it is best to keep these personal matters between you and your partner. This goes back to my first point – always maintain respect. It is highly likely that you both have mutual friends and certainly family connections. You do not want communication or miscommunication to antagonise an already difficult time. This is especially important if there are children involved.